(Warning: Long Post)
I knew that I would find a story! To be honest, sometimes I go through a week, from Friday to Sunday itching for a good story, especially after a week that had one great event. The pressure of people's expectations sometimes gets me all washed out as Saturday comes and I begin to say, "Well it looks like I'll have to write a long introduction and then say, 'I had a good week. The end.' and face the angry mob of disappointed readers." Ok, that's a bit of a carried away thought, so let's sweep that out to sea.
On Friday I went to school and after my sole class I was asking my lecturer a few question about sets and images (read carefully). About ten minutes into the conversation I looked outside with a "what the..." expression on my face. "Yep. I guess that's rain," my lecturer answered. Who knew he was so smart! So I decided to find some more questions to ask because none of us could go anywhere. And about 20 minutes later, I couldn't take the Siberian conditions of the classroom and left to do some studying, sadly, in Alaska. I went back outside to a rainless, cloudy day and did some random stuff by myself until I left school at 1. After which I ran some errands, went home and slept.
I woke up to the noise of my family off loading their school stuff and searching the fridge and the cupboards. As I got downstairs to claim some of the bounty before the pack devoured it all, my mom grabbed and said, "Wash the dishes." She then started calling out plays like a commanding officer in the middle of siege fire and I, with a drowsy and puzzled look, tried to make sense of it all. What happened was that between "fair to partly cloudy" and "cloudy with a few brief scattered showers" a storm decided to pass by.
"Don't you know that we are under storm warning?" my mom asked as she filled the containers with water. "When did this happen?" I asked. The warning was issued at 1 - the time I left school.
I finished washing the dishes and made something to eat and waited until it was time to go to church. Outside was black and the street lights were on. "Better go and bathe. It's almost 7" I thought. "What time is it?" - "5:30" my sister replied. "What?!?! I thought it was 7!" Really and truly, the only difference between then and 7 on a normal night was that I couldn't see the stars. I watched some basketball that night and went to sleep at 10.
I honestly don't remember when I closed the window next to me but by then the rain had started to fall. I turned and wrapped tighter to keep out the coldness. "Ahh...No Auditing tomorrow." I thought with delight. About a few moments later (because sleep time is never accurate) I turned to check that no rain had wet anything that I didn't want to get wet. "Well there goes the electricity." I noted as the street lights had gone out. And I turned to go to sleep again.
I'm sure that I was born upside down. Rain and storm weather have an opposite effect on me than it does on other people. Rain energizes me. Every time it rains I wake up. So at 6am, dark and early, I woke up and thought of things to study/do. I heard a noise approaching my room. It was my mom. "Marcus don't you want to come downstairs? You can use one of the girls' bed." The first answer that came to my head was "nope" but I understood what she meant so I asked, "Do you want me to come downstairs?" - "Yes," she replied so I got up and went into my sisters'...I don't know what to call it...room? (It was ransacked). I made a clearing on the bed, prayed and got up to eat something. When it's raining I blame the rain for making me hungry (when in Rome blame the Romans?)
I started studying around 9. After a little while I realised that I left the rest of my books in the car. So after a meal , some writing and maths, I went outside, in the rain, for my books. My younger-younger sister always says there are no boring things, just boring people. That has been my maxim since then and I was determined to follow it yesterday. But there's not much to do when, in a family of 6, five of them have been sleeping for the past 8 hours. So I read until I could read no more. I studied until I could see no more. I played until it was night, used a cell phone light and soon I will write until I could write no more. But thank God for glow in the dark silly bands. See the other problem is that when I'm up, I can't force myself back to sleep no matter how sleepy I am.
It's been raining for over 24 hours and now there's a river running through my gap and an ankle deep stream flowing past my house (which never floods). It's 6 pm but it's not as dark as it was yesterday (and the cell phone light isn't fooling me). Next week is going to be an interesting week because the hurricane is getting stronger. Part of me wants it to rain until Monday but the sensible side of my compassion knows that cars don't float and people don't have cars - even it they did. So until next time, stay dry.
Sunday, October 31, 2010
Sunday, October 24, 2010
Stories
Each of our lives is a story. And with every person we meet, we become a part of their story and they become a part of ours. Somehow God has masterfully written all of our stories so that they come together to form one story...the greatest story ever told. Aslan, the lion from The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe, once said, "I tell no one any story but his own." (The Horse and His Boy). This is a very hard thing to do, especially when you are a part of great and similar stories, and this blog tries to do that. Not every part of my story which spanned the last week is relevant to what I'm about to say so those things are left out.
Over the last 7 days I've had two mid-terms - Intermediate Cost Accounting (Cost) and Organizational Behaviour (OB). The Cost was pretty ok. I'm not too sure but when someone asks "How was the exam?" do they want to know that or how I did? The exam was in English and it was comprehensible. As for how I did, only time will tell. However, there was this one thing that I didn't study and it kept coming back. It was pretty funny, ironic and unfortunate, and I hope "When in doubt choose C" worked. OB was the same - the exam. that is (written in English) and I think I did well. Most of the exam I knew and I didn't use "When in doubt flip an eraser with a 'B' written on it.
This was a celebratory weekend. All of my friends in the year above me graduated this weekend and my grandmother celebrated 15 years of living after breast cancer. I've never given graduation any thought beyond the fact that some day that will be me, but being in final year and seeing the graduands collect their gowns and how their faces glowed with excitement and dirtied with nostalgia made me realise how real this day will be for me. If all goes according to plan the person with the grin on his face shaking the Chancellor's hand will be me and I'll have letters after my name other than 'lol'. I think that will be a great achievement. The nostalgia comes in when I realise that it's time to move on. There will be no more blogs about school because I won't be there. No more option of skipping 10am classes, no more hiding from people and sleeping in the library. I'll be facing "the real world" as those who have left the system describe it. I don't know what I'll do in it but I didn't really know how my university life would plan out. I just have to wait on the same author - such a faithful author.
One story ended yesterday, that is the one of Barbados' Prime Minister. The whole country is in mourning. He had a really relaxing aura and some really good quotes and policies. For 15 years, he was the leader of the opposition and when the last elections came I honestly didn't think he was going to win. I thought that after losing three times he had a lot of heart to run again. But he had a dream. He had a story. And he lived in it. Sadly, though, two years later he died at the age of 48 from pancreatic cancer. I doubt that many of his goals were realised in his tenure of Prime Minister. We may focus on the fact that he only spent two years in office but the really interesting thing about it is that he no longer knows that he only spent two years in power after waiting and learning for 15 years. He came and he worked in the capacity that he was given. Life is short. Who knows what opportunities will be taken from you (as if they were ever yours) prematurely? Do the right things first.
My heart goes out to his family first and I pray they will find comfort and strength to carry on while they are still alive. My heart also goes out to my country and I pray that we will remain sober minded. To have a change so drastic can create drastic reactions. Prime Ministerial power will change people, rather it reveals people. Who knows what we will live to see?
Over the last 7 days I've had two mid-terms - Intermediate Cost Accounting (Cost) and Organizational Behaviour (OB). The Cost was pretty ok. I'm not too sure but when someone asks "How was the exam?" do they want to know that or how I did? The exam was in English and it was comprehensible. As for how I did, only time will tell. However, there was this one thing that I didn't study and it kept coming back. It was pretty funny, ironic and unfortunate, and I hope "When in doubt choose C" worked. OB was the same - the exam. that is (written in English) and I think I did well. Most of the exam I knew and I didn't use "When in doubt flip an eraser with a 'B' written on it.
This was a celebratory weekend. All of my friends in the year above me graduated this weekend and my grandmother celebrated 15 years of living after breast cancer. I've never given graduation any thought beyond the fact that some day that will be me, but being in final year and seeing the graduands collect their gowns and how their faces glowed with excitement and dirtied with nostalgia made me realise how real this day will be for me. If all goes according to plan the person with the grin on his face shaking the Chancellor's hand will be me and I'll have letters after my name other than 'lol'. I think that will be a great achievement. The nostalgia comes in when I realise that it's time to move on. There will be no more blogs about school because I won't be there. No more option of skipping 10am classes, no more hiding from people and sleeping in the library. I'll be facing "the real world" as those who have left the system describe it. I don't know what I'll do in it but I didn't really know how my university life would plan out. I just have to wait on the same author - such a faithful author.
One story ended yesterday, that is the one of Barbados' Prime Minister. The whole country is in mourning. He had a really relaxing aura and some really good quotes and policies. For 15 years, he was the leader of the opposition and when the last elections came I honestly didn't think he was going to win. I thought that after losing three times he had a lot of heart to run again. But he had a dream. He had a story. And he lived in it. Sadly, though, two years later he died at the age of 48 from pancreatic cancer. I doubt that many of his goals were realised in his tenure of Prime Minister. We may focus on the fact that he only spent two years in office but the really interesting thing about it is that he no longer knows that he only spent two years in power after waiting and learning for 15 years. He came and he worked in the capacity that he was given. Life is short. Who knows what opportunities will be taken from you (as if they were ever yours) prematurely? Do the right things first.
My heart goes out to his family first and I pray they will find comfort and strength to carry on while they are still alive. My heart also goes out to my country and I pray that we will remain sober minded. To have a change so drastic can create drastic reactions. Prime Ministerial power will change people, rather it reveals people. Who knows what we will live to see?
Saturday, October 16, 2010
When Faith Fails
What's school without a lesson or two?
Six weeks ago, school started. I continued my trek toward my first degree in September full of energy and dripping with wisdom and insight. When I came back from the youth camps and after I turned 21 I felt like I was wiser. It was interesting. For one, the ground looked farther away than before and a lot of things that I observed either made sense or reminded me of something I learned as a youngster - even that phrase had new meaning..."youngster". I was excited to be at school, excited to continue school and excited to finish school.
Six weeks later I am lying down in my bed, on the advent of mid-terms, asking like Elisha "Where is now is the God of Elijah?" Now we can bridge our gaping mouths with our palms because....Christians don't doubt! But let me be honest and quote Shakespeare "If you prick us do we not bleed? If you tickle us do we not laugh? If you poison us do we not die?" (this last one I'm not willing to test) Am I not as much a human as everyone else? As my second favourite rapper said "We recognize that life's hard. The difference is instead of drowning we trust the Life Guard." Life's hard...life guard.
It was once said that it is the object of faith that makes faith faithful. Two weeks ago I was at a bible study session where the topic was faith. The leader asked us to define faith and then give some examples of when we had to exercise our faith. Everyone did that and talked about how God came through for them etc. I didn't want to play Devil's advocate (especially at bible study if you get what I'm saying) but I thought about all those times when he didn't "come through". For example, when David fasted for 7 days and asked God to save his son and the child still died. Or when I studied hard and believed that I got an A and still failed Differential Equations. What then?
Should I still obey God even when he didn't do what I wanted? During the vacation I had a talk with a friend of mine and I asked her, "What have I done to make God love me?" Often times we believe that it was our will that caused God to save us. It's easy to think that God is our genie - we just rub him with the fingers of belief and our wish is his command. But that's not the case. To recognize that God will do whatever he pleases with my life scares me sometimes. I mean, I think that it is so easy for him to just not give me straight A's or B's when I worked my tail off and trusted him. But I know why he does whatever he pleases. He does it so that in all things, people will see my good works (and his) and praise Him, and not me. He does it for his glory, not mine. And this is a comforting, yet humbling fact.
God is good. It is his nature. Job said, "Though he slay me yet will I trust him." (Job 13:15). That sounds all fancy and would really get more than a few "Hallelujahs" from the congregation but when Job said that he was surrounded by 3 wise men who told him that God was punishing him. Job recognized that God was sovereign and good. You know, the funny thing is that anything that God does to us other than exciting his wrath on us is all because of his goodness. Evil is to be punished. You and I, we think evil, do evil and speak evil. Yet we're still breathing, unpunished. Not because God is a wuss but because he's so good that he's giving us an opportunity to know him.
A lot of christians today base their relationship with God on what he has done for them. So God is good when my teacher falls ill on the day of the mid-term and we have an extra week. Or God is good when I find out sheis single. Or God is good when that student drops $50 at bus stop. But is he good when you were the one who dropped the $50? Is he good when you were the one who broke up? Is he good when the illness turns out to be terminal? Those things don't make God good. God is good all by himself. It's like saying "part wunna gine" doesn't make me Bajan. I was born a Bajan. God existed as good.
Sometimes people ask me why am I a christian. It wasn't my choosing, he chose me. He has something to do in my life. He has something to do in yours. If I never get anything from God it doesn't stop him from being God, it doesn't stop him from being good. (Yeah I would be a lot disappointed, maybe slightly miserable). If I never get anything from God I would still be glad that he gave me life and a chance to know him. I am contented to know him.
"So I cry refusing all the lies
Pain is my ally when aligned to who you are
There's more to my scars so I know there's more to yours.
I'm resting in your arms
I'm resting in your wrists
I'm pressing with a limp pain is purposed through your gift
I'm strengthening my grip may this faith in you persist
And when this half insists I pray you breathe in me
Amazing is your grace cus while I'm holding you it seems
The truth of the matter is you're really holding me."
- Half of Me (Sho Baraka)
Six weeks ago, school started. I continued my trek toward my first degree in September full of energy and dripping with wisdom and insight. When I came back from the youth camps and after I turned 21 I felt like I was wiser. It was interesting. For one, the ground looked farther away than before and a lot of things that I observed either made sense or reminded me of something I learned as a youngster - even that phrase had new meaning..."youngster". I was excited to be at school, excited to continue school and excited to finish school.
Six weeks later I am lying down in my bed, on the advent of mid-terms, asking like Elisha "Where is now is the God of Elijah?" Now we can bridge our gaping mouths with our palms because....Christians don't doubt! But let me be honest and quote Shakespeare "If you prick us do we not bleed? If you tickle us do we not laugh? If you poison us do we not die?" (this last one I'm not willing to test) Am I not as much a human as everyone else? As my second favourite rapper said "We recognize that life's hard. The difference is instead of drowning we trust the Life Guard." Life's hard...life guard.
It was once said that it is the object of faith that makes faith faithful. Two weeks ago I was at a bible study session where the topic was faith. The leader asked us to define faith and then give some examples of when we had to exercise our faith. Everyone did that and talked about how God came through for them etc. I didn't want to play Devil's advocate (especially at bible study if you get what I'm saying) but I thought about all those times when he didn't "come through". For example, when David fasted for 7 days and asked God to save his son and the child still died. Or when I studied hard and believed that I got an A and still failed Differential Equations. What then?
Should I still obey God even when he didn't do what I wanted? During the vacation I had a talk with a friend of mine and I asked her, "What have I done to make God love me?" Often times we believe that it was our will that caused God to save us. It's easy to think that God is our genie - we just rub him with the fingers of belief and our wish is his command. But that's not the case. To recognize that God will do whatever he pleases with my life scares me sometimes. I mean, I think that it is so easy for him to just not give me straight A's or B's when I worked my tail off and trusted him. But I know why he does whatever he pleases. He does it so that in all things, people will see my good works (and his) and praise Him, and not me. He does it for his glory, not mine. And this is a comforting, yet humbling fact.
God is good. It is his nature. Job said, "Though he slay me yet will I trust him." (Job 13:15). That sounds all fancy and would really get more than a few "Hallelujahs" from the congregation but when Job said that he was surrounded by 3 wise men who told him that God was punishing him. Job recognized that God was sovereign and good. You know, the funny thing is that anything that God does to us other than exciting his wrath on us is all because of his goodness. Evil is to be punished. You and I, we think evil, do evil and speak evil. Yet we're still breathing, unpunished. Not because God is a wuss but because he's so good that he's giving us an opportunity to know him.
A lot of christians today base their relationship with God on what he has done for them. So God is good when my teacher falls ill on the day of the mid-term and we have an extra week. Or God is good when I find out she
Sometimes people ask me why am I a christian. It wasn't my choosing, he chose me. He has something to do in my life. He has something to do in yours. If I never get anything from God it doesn't stop him from being God, it doesn't stop him from being good. (Yeah I would be a lot disappointed, maybe slightly miserable). If I never get anything from God I would still be glad that he gave me life and a chance to know him. I am contented to know him.
"So I cry refusing all the lies
Pain is my ally when aligned to who you are
There's more to my scars so I know there's more to yours.
I'm resting in your arms
I'm resting in your wrists
I'm pressing with a limp pain is purposed through your gift
I'm strengthening my grip may this faith in you persist
And when this half insists I pray you breathe in me
Amazing is your grace cus while I'm holding you it seems
The truth of the matter is you're really holding me."
- Half of Me (Sho Baraka)
Monday, October 11, 2010
Welcome To Barbados
Have you ever been to a Caribbean country and have people sing songs of the territory to you? Thankfully it has never happened to me, nor have I had to do it. What has happened though is that I was stopped and grilled by a police after I came through immigration - Welcome Home? This one goes out to all my Bajan friends, the real ones and the ones who wished they were Bajan. This one goes out to everyone in the world lol.
Before we begin, let's look at last week. The presentation was bad but the essay was good. But as for the other events...well...that's a different story.
And here it is. I have a friend from Trinidad who came to Barbados to study. Among other things, she was given strict instructions not to eat from Chefette. And she obeyed them, until last week. I went to a concert and afterword we were hungry and looking for a place to eat at. It was here that she informed us of the command. "I'm not going to eat Chefette," she said, impressing upon us that her convictions were immutable. Asking why was no use, neither was trying to debunk her myths, but since the other restaurants were closed and she was not driving, we decided to go to Chefette.
The safest road to hell is the gradual one - the gentle slope, soft underfoot, without sudden turnings, without milestones, without signposts (C. S. Lewis).
We sat in Chefette and talked as she continue to make it clear that she was NOT going to eat Chefette. (She also said that she was not even going to go in Chefette). When it was time to eat, those who were hungry ordered their food. As we sat and ate we asked her, "Aren't you going to eat some?" "NO!" she answered. We ate until the scent filled the whole room and she just couldn't stand the pressure. "Eat it! Eat it! Eat it!" the voices inside and outside her head cried. "Ok." All eyes were fixed on her as she took a small portion, ignoring all warnings, and ate. (Then she gave some to her husband who was with her...lol just kidding). "It's ok" she said while fighting to hold back a smile. And if that wasn't bad enough she had a second set! So much for "I'm not eating Chefette!"
The second story involves the members of my OB group. It is not as victorious as the first one though. After the group meeting was finished on Wednesday we were sitting around and talking about Barbados' lovely public transportation system. We talked about standing in ZR's (minivans) and being so squashed that you can't change your mind and listening to the tunes blazing inside while your eardrums get rattle.
Now I confess that Bajans are the worst in giving directions. My friend, who's from Nevis, wanted to get to town. Someone told him that town is "just down the road" so he decided to walk there from Wanstead (5 min highway time). So he's walking and the sun is obviously not cool at any time of this day. After getting a working knowledge of what "down the road" means he decided to ask someone if town was really down the road. Of course it is. With renewed vigour, he continued his trek to town. About a while later he realizes that this was a bad idea so he stopped and asked someone else where was town. "Oh it's just down the road". By this time he figured that it was actually down the road since he'd been walking for more than 45 minutes. So he kept walking...and walking...and walking.......Red Label....Black Label...Civil Rights...walking. At this time now, he was frustrated and realized that "down the road" is not five minutes, turn corner and see the destination. It's more, five minutes, turn the corner and see the destination - on Google Maps. Like Brian McKnight, he gave one last cry, "Where is town?" "Oh it's around the corner." Relief hit him as he thought that that was closer than "just down the road". Well it is but then again the moon is closer to the earth than the sun. In the end he did reach town and vowed never to walk to anywhere that is "just down the road". He will definitely keep that vow.
My final story is strictly Bajan in nature. If you're not Bajan, you can stop reading here and have a great week.
The conversation somehow changed to the topic of food. A friend of another group member got married and was living here. One day she and her friend, both non-nationals by birth, decided to go to a bakery for some salt bread. Upon opening the pack they found the coconut leaf on the top so they went back to the bakery and told someone "I think you sold me bad bread. This has in grass."
This is my country - broasted tenderness in the meat, long walks on the beach (or down the road for that matter) and grass in our bread. It is true, there is a never a dull moment in Barbados.
Before we begin, let's look at last week. The presentation was bad but the essay was good. But as for the other events...well...that's a different story.
And here it is. I have a friend from Trinidad who came to Barbados to study. Among other things, she was given strict instructions not to eat from Chefette. And she obeyed them, until last week. I went to a concert and afterword we were hungry and looking for a place to eat at. It was here that she informed us of the command. "I'm not going to eat Chefette," she said, impressing upon us that her convictions were immutable. Asking why was no use, neither was trying to debunk her myths, but since the other restaurants were closed and she was not driving, we decided to go to Chefette.
The safest road to hell is the gradual one - the gentle slope, soft underfoot, without sudden turnings, without milestones, without signposts (C. S. Lewis).
We sat in Chefette and talked as she continue to make it clear that she was NOT going to eat Chefette. (She also said that she was not even going to go in Chefette). When it was time to eat, those who were hungry ordered their food. As we sat and ate we asked her, "Aren't you going to eat some?" "NO!" she answered. We ate until the scent filled the whole room and she just couldn't stand the pressure. "Eat it! Eat it! Eat it!" the voices inside and outside her head cried. "Ok." All eyes were fixed on her as she took a small portion, ignoring all warnings, and ate. (Then she gave some to her husband who was with her...lol just kidding). "It's ok" she said while fighting to hold back a smile. And if that wasn't bad enough she had a second set! So much for "I'm not eating Chefette!"
The second story involves the members of my OB group. It is not as victorious as the first one though. After the group meeting was finished on Wednesday we were sitting around and talking about Barbados' lovely public transportation system. We talked about standing in ZR's (minivans) and being so squashed that you can't change your mind and listening to the tunes blazing inside while your eardrums get rattle.
Now I confess that Bajans are the worst in giving directions. My friend, who's from Nevis, wanted to get to town. Someone told him that town is "just down the road" so he decided to walk there from Wanstead (5 min highway time). So he's walking and the sun is obviously not cool at any time of this day. After getting a working knowledge of what "down the road" means he decided to ask someone if town was really down the road. Of course it is. With renewed vigour, he continued his trek to town. About a while later he realizes that this was a bad idea so he stopped and asked someone else where was town. "Oh it's just down the road". By this time he figured that it was actually down the road since he'd been walking for more than 45 minutes. So he kept walking...and walking...and walking.......Red Label....Black Label...Civil Rights...walking. At this time now, he was frustrated and realized that "down the road" is not five minutes, turn corner and see the destination. It's more, five minutes, turn the corner and see the destination - on Google Maps. Like Brian McKnight, he gave one last cry, "Where is town?" "Oh it's around the corner." Relief hit him as he thought that that was closer than "just down the road". Well it is but then again the moon is closer to the earth than the sun. In the end he did reach town and vowed never to walk to anywhere that is "just down the road". He will definitely keep that vow.
My final story is strictly Bajan in nature. If you're not Bajan, you can stop reading here and have a great week.
The conversation somehow changed to the topic of food. A friend of another group member got married and was living here. One day she and her friend, both non-nationals by birth, decided to go to a bakery for some salt bread. Upon opening the pack they found the coconut leaf on the top so they went back to the bakery and told someone "I think you sold me bad bread. This has in grass."
This is my country - broasted tenderness in the meat, long walks on the beach (or down the road for that matter) and grass in our bread. It is true, there is a never a dull moment in Barbados.
Sunday, October 03, 2010
Circles
Another day, another sunrise, another factory call. Another night, another sunset, another freefall..." Circles, Switchfoot
I've never had a week like this. It's like school decided to start this week. He said, "Let's start the work now. You've had enough gallivanting and you're on top of the work." Then he whispered, "Let's see what this baby can do." On Monday I went to school and realized that the mid-terms start in 2 weeks! Now I wasn't particularly bothered because I did the work for the most part so with extra reading I should be fine. Oh but on Tuesday I went to Probability Theory and was quite concerned. Stats seems to be my kryptonite. I chose the course because I think that if you're studying accounting you should have a pretty good knowledge of probability. But...*sigh*...I don't know why I can never get this understood. I've thought that I don't read the question correctly (and that may be the most accurate reason) and miss that one clause that makes the whole question make sense. So I went to class and it made a little sense, but that's neither the beginning nor the end of my week.
I left class and decided to go to bible study. What started out as a conversation with the president quickly turned into an interrogation from higher authorities. At first I thought he was trying to pick my brain and test me on what I know but then the questions got really weird and I started quoting Sho Baraka, "C'mon son, I know you done lost your mind." (The Revolution - you should check it out, it's a nice song). So after two hours (and opting out of class because I didn't do the homework) I left there tired and a bit down from missing class and wondering what I'm going to do concerning Probability Theory.
I went to Optimization Theory - yes, even the name makes it sound hard lol. It is hard but I'm slowly understanding it. Maths is an everyday process and "practice makes permanent" is the first axiom of the subject. When I got to the door I saw my friend outside crying so I put down my bag and stayed with her until her dad came for her. Another class missed. She went home and I went to my final class of the day, Law, Governance and Society. The presentations started that day and I was trying my best not to fall asleep. Not only were the presentations quite boring (as most presentations tend to be) but the subject matter only made it worse. It takes a lot of creativity and a large dose of craziness to make stir interest while comparing the Kalina and the Mayas; and comparing Suriname and Belize. So when that was over the teacher said, "next week we'll do questions 4, 6 and 7 ok?" NO!!! I'm doing question 6! He looked at me and asked me if I wanted to present next week and of course I said no but my group members said yes and the constitution was changed by a 2/3 majority vote. So I have a presentation on Tuesday.
Usually I drive to school but that day the car went to get serviced. I waited around school for someone to pick me up. I sat by the lobby and waited. I talked by the lobby and waited. I drummed at the lobby and waited. I cried at the lobby and waited. Then an hour and some later my ride came for me and I went home. When I got home my friend came over and we tried out his new resistance bands. It is only now that I typed this that I understand why my legs were hurting me that week.
This was no problem until Wednesday. On Wednesday I happily walked into Organization Behaviour (OB) (not only because my lecturer makes nice eye candy but the course is interesting). After we discussed a case in class and before we left the lecturer said, "So...for next week I want you to write a 3 page essay, ok?" NO!!! Why do teachers say ok when they know that it isn't?!?! She continued, "It will be peer-reviewed. Three pages, double spaced" (as if double spacing it makes it any better). I left class thinking about the Halo I was not going to play, the junk food I was not going to eat and the concert I was not going to go to. My whole weekend was spoiled.
I went to a group meeting afterword where we discussed the report and the presentation for OB. I had the brilliant idea that we should do away with putting words in the power point slides and just have smile faces of all different colours and sizes while presenting. After all, the lecturer did say "you can do anything" and I usually take that literally. The group did not embrace that idea because they thought that it would be too distracting and there would be no safety net if anyone forgot their train of thought. I agree. But I also would love to do that in one of my presentation. I think groups bring a certain control to my ideas. (Can you imagine sitting down in a presentation and seeing only smiley faces...amazing!)
So that evening I did some reading in the library and then went to class. I came home around 10 because I didn't know where my sister was and I was waiting at school for someone to call, which didn't happen until I was half way home. I started to do some general reading so I wouldn't make my other courses suffer because of a presentation and an essay and at 2am I went to sleep.
At 6:30 in the morning I woke up and got ready for school. The only part of me which wasn't hurting were my fingernails. I went to Auditing and learned about the audit process (I think) and then ate lunch and went to Optimization. It's hard to sleep when you only have two classes. The class was dead. No one seemed to be there and there was a great cloud over all of our heads. Not only that but my friend wasn't there so the class was eerily quiet. Again I had to wait at school to be picked up and that's never fun. I got home, there was devotions and I went straight to work until 12:30 (when I said to myself, "Go to bed.").
I got to school early on Friday (surprise, surprise) and did some reading up on the class. By this time, the essay was almost done, just missing a conclusion - which I could not find at such a late hour the night before. I went to class, took notes, tried to understand amidst a lingering headache and then class was over. I saw my friend (who stalks me) while I was talking to one of my ex-math buddies about the joys of our 3rd year math courses. I finished the essay when he went to class and then did some reading for the group assignment for OB. The lingering headache grew to a pulsating one so I went outside for fresh air and light conversation. Then I went back inside to continue but after eating I decided to pull up 3 chairs and sleep. After about 45 min I woke up and packed my bags because another class was starting.
Saturday. I had hardly gotten any sleep that Friday because I came home late from church and to be honest my brain was still in study after 11 mode. I woke up and tried to do work but the beauty of studying at home when your parents haven't seen you except for getting ready to leave and now getting home is they miss you. So every 5 min i was called to do something and I could never start working. Of course this was annoying since I hadn't started the presentation yet. But the rain came (oh how I love the rain). Something in the hum of the rain falling in the roof relaxed me and I started the presentation and finished it. And then I got extra reading done!
So at 2 I ran off to my meeting, which was productive I must add, and then to the concert with Russell Leonce. That was amazing! If you don't know Russell youtube him. (Ok that's his 15 second promo)
This week I saw black circles on my eyes! It was pretty cool and quite scary at the same time because black circles and hurting legs are two signs of lacking sleep and also black circles bring bags and bags are only cool when you can unzip them. I've realised that third year is harder than second year and requires more work, more time and more effort. There's a motivation theory that says that when you try to hype employees doing tasks which require long and constant concentration more harm than good is done. Yeah, you can't Red Bull your semester.
In my life, in my own purpose, within my weakness, within my weakness..." - Circles, Switchfoot
I've never had a week like this. It's like school decided to start this week. He said, "Let's start the work now. You've had enough gallivanting and you're on top of the work." Then he whispered, "Let's see what this baby can do." On Monday I went to school and realized that the mid-terms start in 2 weeks! Now I wasn't particularly bothered because I did the work for the most part so with extra reading I should be fine. Oh but on Tuesday I went to Probability Theory and was quite concerned. Stats seems to be my kryptonite. I chose the course because I think that if you're studying accounting you should have a pretty good knowledge of probability. But...*sigh*...I don't know why I can never get this understood. I've thought that I don't read the question correctly (and that may be the most accurate reason) and miss that one clause that makes the whole question make sense. So I went to class and it made a little sense, but that's neither the beginning nor the end of my week.
I left class and decided to go to bible study. What started out as a conversation with the president quickly turned into an interrogation from higher authorities. At first I thought he was trying to pick my brain and test me on what I know but then the questions got really weird and I started quoting Sho Baraka, "C'mon son, I know you done lost your mind." (The Revolution - you should check it out, it's a nice song). So after two hours (and opting out of class because I didn't do the homework) I left there tired and a bit down from missing class and wondering what I'm going to do concerning Probability Theory.
I went to Optimization Theory - yes, even the name makes it sound hard lol. It is hard but I'm slowly understanding it. Maths is an everyday process and "practice makes permanent" is the first axiom of the subject. When I got to the door I saw my friend outside crying so I put down my bag and stayed with her until her dad came for her. Another class missed. She went home and I went to my final class of the day, Law, Governance and Society. The presentations started that day and I was trying my best not to fall asleep. Not only were the presentations quite boring (as most presentations tend to be) but the subject matter only made it worse. It takes a lot of creativity and a large dose of craziness to make stir interest while comparing the Kalina and the Mayas; and comparing Suriname and Belize. So when that was over the teacher said, "next week we'll do questions 4, 6 and 7 ok?" NO!!! I'm doing question 6! He looked at me and asked me if I wanted to present next week and of course I said no but my group members said yes and the constitution was changed by a 2/3 majority vote. So I have a presentation on Tuesday.
Usually I drive to school but that day the car went to get serviced. I waited around school for someone to pick me up. I sat by the lobby and waited. I talked by the lobby and waited. I drummed at the lobby and waited. I cried at the lobby and waited. Then an hour and some later my ride came for me and I went home. When I got home my friend came over and we tried out his new resistance bands. It is only now that I typed this that I understand why my legs were hurting me that week.
This was no problem until Wednesday. On Wednesday I happily walked into Organization Behaviour (OB) (not only because my lecturer makes nice eye candy but the course is interesting). After we discussed a case in class and before we left the lecturer said, "So...for next week I want you to write a 3 page essay, ok?" NO!!! Why do teachers say ok when they know that it isn't?!?! She continued, "It will be peer-reviewed. Three pages, double spaced" (as if double spacing it makes it any better). I left class thinking about the Halo I was not going to play, the junk food I was not going to eat and the concert I was not going to go to. My whole weekend was spoiled.
I went to a group meeting afterword where we discussed the report and the presentation for OB. I had the brilliant idea that we should do away with putting words in the power point slides and just have smile faces of all different colours and sizes while presenting. After all, the lecturer did say "you can do anything" and I usually take that literally. The group did not embrace that idea because they thought that it would be too distracting and there would be no safety net if anyone forgot their train of thought. I agree. But I also would love to do that in one of my presentation. I think groups bring a certain control to my ideas. (Can you imagine sitting down in a presentation and seeing only smiley faces...amazing!)
So that evening I did some reading in the library and then went to class. I came home around 10 because I didn't know where my sister was and I was waiting at school for someone to call, which didn't happen until I was half way home. I started to do some general reading so I wouldn't make my other courses suffer because of a presentation and an essay and at 2am I went to sleep.
At 6:30 in the morning I woke up and got ready for school. The only part of me which wasn't hurting were my fingernails. I went to Auditing and learned about the audit process (I think) and then ate lunch and went to Optimization. It's hard to sleep when you only have two classes. The class was dead. No one seemed to be there and there was a great cloud over all of our heads. Not only that but my friend wasn't there so the class was eerily quiet. Again I had to wait at school to be picked up and that's never fun. I got home, there was devotions and I went straight to work until 12:30 (when I said to myself, "Go to bed.").
I got to school early on Friday (surprise, surprise) and did some reading up on the class. By this time, the essay was almost done, just missing a conclusion - which I could not find at such a late hour the night before. I went to class, took notes, tried to understand amidst a lingering headache and then class was over. I saw my friend (who stalks me) while I was talking to one of my ex-math buddies about the joys of our 3rd year math courses. I finished the essay when he went to class and then did some reading for the group assignment for OB. The lingering headache grew to a pulsating one so I went outside for fresh air and light conversation. Then I went back inside to continue but after eating I decided to pull up 3 chairs and sleep. After about 45 min I woke up and packed my bags because another class was starting.
Saturday. I had hardly gotten any sleep that Friday because I came home late from church and to be honest my brain was still in study after 11 mode. I woke up and tried to do work but the beauty of studying at home when your parents haven't seen you except for getting ready to leave and now getting home is they miss you. So every 5 min i was called to do something and I could never start working. Of course this was annoying since I hadn't started the presentation yet. But the rain came (oh how I love the rain). Something in the hum of the rain falling in the roof relaxed me and I started the presentation and finished it. And then I got extra reading done!
So at 2 I ran off to my meeting, which was productive I must add, and then to the concert with Russell Leonce. That was amazing! If you don't know Russell youtube him. (Ok that's his 15 second promo)
This week I saw black circles on my eyes! It was pretty cool and quite scary at the same time because black circles and hurting legs are two signs of lacking sleep and also black circles bring bags and bags are only cool when you can unzip them. I've realised that third year is harder than second year and requires more work, more time and more effort. There's a motivation theory that says that when you try to hype employees doing tasks which require long and constant concentration more harm than good is done. Yeah, you can't Red Bull your semester.
In my life, in my own purpose, within my weakness, within my weakness..." - Circles, Switchfoot
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