I can believe that we've come to the end of another semester already. It's not that strange that all good things (and bad things) must come to an end. One should be very careful what one asks for, because he/she may get it at a time not wanted. For example, I've been crying out for a vacation. As the hour drew near I sat down to do some accounting. Then it hit me: I HAVE ONE WEEK BEFORE MY EXAM AND I KNOW NOTHING! I've been accused of being overly dramatic (guilty here) but I think we all get the point. Sure, vacation is fun - building things, burning stuff, going to the beach - but to get vacation, one must take pre-vacation questionnaires. It's all fun and games when you know you're on the road to an A+ but when you're scampering frantically up? no down a steep slope to the jaws of death that tends to give a different response. Somehow you just wish time would stop and you regret your decision or do something about it. So as the days turned to weeks and weeks turn to daze, we'll have our last write before we go our separate ways.
As I hinted, school's ending. Last week we pretty much wrapped up all the lectures and got the benedictions from our teachers. No more Principles of Marketing, no more Caribbean Civilization, no more Financial Accounting 1, no more Abstract Algebra, no more Analysis and Maths Methods. All done; exams are here.
On Thursday I went to visit my friend Laura at YWAM. The last time I saw her was the last week in September. For those of you who don't know, YWAM is within normal walking distance to my house. It's roughly a mile downhill. Now don't jump in my neck just yet and tell me how bad I am, I really didn't have much excuse besides ignorance. It was really good to see her again. I heard that the speaker was really interesting so all the time I thought about that night, I thought she was playing a joke and she or my brother was the speaker. I'm driving and driving, expecting this really great surprise. When I arrived, they were praying so I stood outside until they were finished. As I walked in to meet Laura, my eye caught this tall, slim figure with glasses and locks standing before everyone.
*Gasp*...could it really be? Wow...
Immediately, my mind raced through time to the days when I was short and bony (I mean the beginning of those times, not last month). I remembered songs like...well let me not say that...and let me not say that one either....and...and...wow. Each memory just flashing in great vividness all in that one moment. I stood there wondering, "Did he notice me?" I stood there, trying not to stare into the speaker's face while trying to hide and peep from behind a pillar in the room, all the while this guy is speaking. I could not believe it, Andy was in Barbados. As I sat, I was just thinking that Laura does not know what she just did.
The talk was on idolatry and it was cool. To sum things up, idolatry was defined as "taking something good and making it ultimate" (his words adopted from Keller). Therefore, power is good, reputation is good but reputation should not be ultimate. The thing that you continually sacrifice to is your idol. If you think you need it to define you, it's your idol. And it's so easy for something to become an idol. All you need to do is to love it until you seek to feed it, to keep it surviving, until it becomes ultimate; then you'll realise you have given it your worship. Now the thing is, when you realise that you're committing idolatry, you shouldn't be scared - actually you should be glad that God is still nudging you into the right direction. The real point of fear is when God does nothing; when he gives you over to these things (as he did in Romans 1:24)...dread that day and pee your pants...no just don't go there.
So I finally saw my friends. Like Abraham and his grandfather, like the Israelites, it took me 40 years to get to the promised land and when I finally got there, I was glad.
Monday, November 30, 2009
Monday, November 23, 2009
The Rest is HIStory
Another week ends on a Saturday the moment before the clock strikes midnight. (For us who do calculus, this means that there exists an positive epsilon such that [t-epsilon, t+epsilon]<0...lol..and for those who don't do calculus, it ends at midnight). As we all know, the weather in Barbados is pretty interesting. It's either wet or dry. This week it was wet. It rained Monday, Tuesday, Thursday and Friday.
I found out a really interesting thing about my life; my mood is directly proportional to the weather. I was pretty much under the weather that entire week. On Monday morning, I woke up bright and early ready to tackle the week. Boy did I get sidelined. The final group presented on "Green Marketing". To cut a long and traumatizing story short, the teacher exploded. Then she asked if anyone had any questions. When I finally got my heart in my chest and beating at a reasonable rate, I asked a question. "Reasonable question, reasonable answer." After class, my friend and I stood outside of class shocked, just staring at each other. "Well that was a bit scary." I wished my trouble had ended there. As I was eating lunch that day I saw my teacher. Like a deer who has sensed its predator in the bushes I tried to remain calm. Unfortunately, the lioness spotted me. "C'mon Marcus, you don't have to look like I'm going to attack you," she said quite lovingly. I thought, "I wonder why you would think that." but I said, "If you were going to attack me I'd have to die here because I can't move [from the sharp, stabbing pain in my leg]." She smiled and we continued talking. Please, don't think that my teacher is crazy, she just cares a lot and expects her students to use their God-given brains.
Wednesday!...Drumming...In the words of Wangstas "It was off da heezy!" Basically we learnt phrases. We went from the simple crash crash crash to more complex stuff like 32nd's...bim! If I've told you that I loved the sound of drums, that was only half true. I love the sound of cymbals crashing. Yeah, after a while I was just making noise but that's not the point. So I went home and I've been practising ever since. I've been taking my friend's advice but it's still a bit easy to slip back into old habits. Somewhere in the noise I was just letting Petra play because I was afraid that it would sound bad. She told me, "If it sounds bad I'll tell you." (As if that's going to make it any easier. Anyways I just played; and she said it was nice! So I played and played, then ended up making noise again. It's as a guy I met once said, we shouldn't be afraid of letting people see our mistakes. Making mistakes hurts but it's through our transparency that we get better.
On Thursday it rained.
It's always good to have an avenue to express yourself when thoughts are too heavy for the trucks to carry. On Friday UCCF (University/Colleges Christian Fellowship) had a talent showcase and I was asked to perform one of my poems. I chose one called "Two Worlds Collide" because it was the first performance piece I wrote and most importantly, it was the first poem I wrote since I lost my book over the summer. I sat in the chair for two hours, waiting for my name to be called. Waiting...waiting...just...waiting. As the hour drew near to the end I slouched back into my chair. I knew I wasn't going to be heard - for the second time. *sigh*...So what does one do? I carried my hurt and disappointment around with me all that night, thinking "What's the use? Why do I even write? If this is a talent night, maybe I have no talent." I got to church that night and as I was about to prepare for the session I decided to drum. And I drummed...and drummed....and drummed. Amazingly, I felt this calm come over me. Everything was going right! All the fills and phrases that licked me up over the past two days were just falling. It was so pure!
Life can stress us out, if we allow it to. As a quote that I read read, "Hard work, when the mind is at rest can be very fruitful." So be at rest oh my soul for God has been good to you. No, seriously, God has been good to you.
I found out a really interesting thing about my life; my mood is directly proportional to the weather. I was pretty much under the weather that entire week. On Monday morning, I woke up bright and early ready to tackle the week. Boy did I get sidelined. The final group presented on "Green Marketing". To cut a long and traumatizing story short, the teacher exploded. Then she asked if anyone had any questions. When I finally got my heart in my chest and beating at a reasonable rate, I asked a question. "Reasonable question, reasonable answer." After class, my friend and I stood outside of class shocked, just staring at each other. "Well that was a bit scary." I wished my trouble had ended there. As I was eating lunch that day I saw my teacher. Like a deer who has sensed its predator in the bushes I tried to remain calm. Unfortunately, the lioness spotted me. "C'mon Marcus, you don't have to look like I'm going to attack you," she said quite lovingly. I thought, "I wonder why you would think that." but I said, "If you were going to attack me I'd have to die here because I can't move [from the sharp, stabbing pain in my leg]." She smiled and we continued talking. Please, don't think that my teacher is crazy, she just cares a lot and expects her students to use their God-given brains.
Wednesday!...Drumming...In the words of Wangstas "It was off da heezy!" Basically we learnt phrases. We went from the simple crash crash crash to more complex stuff like 32nd's...bim! If I've told you that I loved the sound of drums, that was only half true. I love the sound of cymbals crashing. Yeah, after a while I was just making noise but that's not the point. So I went home and I've been practising ever since. I've been taking my friend's advice but it's still a bit easy to slip back into old habits. Somewhere in the noise I was just letting Petra play because I was afraid that it would sound bad. She told me, "If it sounds bad I'll tell you." (As if that's going to make it any easier. Anyways I just played; and she said it was nice! So I played and played, then ended up making noise again. It's as a guy I met once said, we shouldn't be afraid of letting people see our mistakes. Making mistakes hurts but it's through our transparency that we get better.
On Thursday it rained.
It's always good to have an avenue to express yourself when thoughts are too heavy for the trucks to carry. On Friday UCCF (University/Colleges Christian Fellowship) had a talent showcase and I was asked to perform one of my poems. I chose one called "Two Worlds Collide" because it was the first performance piece I wrote and most importantly, it was the first poem I wrote since I lost my book over the summer. I sat in the chair for two hours, waiting for my name to be called. Waiting...waiting...just...waiting. As the hour drew near to the end I slouched back into my chair. I knew I wasn't going to be heard - for the second time. *sigh*...So what does one do? I carried my hurt and disappointment around with me all that night, thinking "What's the use? Why do I even write? If this is a talent night, maybe I have no talent." I got to church that night and as I was about to prepare for the session I decided to drum. And I drummed...and drummed....and drummed. Amazingly, I felt this calm come over me. Everything was going right! All the fills and phrases that licked me up over the past two days were just falling. It was so pure!
Life can stress us out, if we allow it to. As a quote that I read read, "Hard work, when the mind is at rest can be very fruitful." So be at rest oh my soul for God has been good to you. No, seriously, God has been good to you.
Monday, November 16, 2009
Food For Thought
3 hours of basketball tends to give one's brain a chance to rest. After an interesting week, three hours of basketball seemed to be the remedy to a balanced life. It must be then that I had an excellent week. I opened my eyes today, thankful that that was the one thing I was able to do. Last night during my dreams I clearly remember trying to move and dragging my right foot over the left one while breathing heavily and moaning. I usually end up in pain after playing basketball (you know, heart's bigger than the mind) but it was never anything quite like this. My back felt like it was locked up and my right knee was just plain hurting. I don't think a word exists for what I felt. But I woke up in good mental health.
On Wednesday I went to sleep at 3 am because I was watching Keenan and Kel (Orange Soda!!!) I officially hate Daylight Saving Time, all the shows are pushed back one hour. Four hours later, I rushed out of bed to bathe and get ready for my 8 am class. After skipping breakfast, because I had to leave in 10 minutes, pack my bag and brush my teeth, I rushed for my flask, sitting lone on the counter. The day went on, class, (hunger), class, (starvation), class, (now about to die). As I lay dying, outside of class, I took out my fork, unwrapped it and made myself mentally prepared. There's a quote saying, "True poverty is not having anything. True poverty is not having anything and not knowing if it will get better. True poverty is having no hope." Well I was dirt poor. The flask was strangely warm when I touched it, 5 hours later, but you know what they say, a hungry man is a man who does not have food. I opened the flask, with great expectancy; a smile painted across my face as I anticipated relief...ok let's try that again...I opened the flask with great expectancy and a smile painted across my face as I anticipated relief...flask open, where's the relief. WHERE'S MY LUNCH?!?!
I sat on the bench by myself, staring into this pond of steaming water. I didn't know what to think. It just added to an already sky diving without a parachute day. I thought, "Maybe I should go buy some Ramin, shake it up and eat it." But that wouldn't make a good story, would it? Plus I had no money. But what's worse is that I had no wallet.
As my already avalanching day continued to be buried under the tragic events, I decided to call mummy (with the phone with no money). I explained the situation and she said to call daddy. Well I also explained that I don't have money on my phone. A few moments later, daddy called me while I was dragging myself, my pride and my flask full of hot water around campus. I followed these instructions to the famous 218 - my life saver - where I was greeted by these warm (no pun intended), welcoming words, "How's your hot water Mr. King?" In love, I answered, since you shouldn't bit the hand that feeds you. I ate and went back to school, while news about this spread across the world like disturbed ants.
My life never seems to be devoid of interesting events. Maybe I should write a book about my life - I'd call it "A Book About My Life". On Wednesday, I learnt a new fill and on Tuesday I had a blast but that's classified information. I found out today that there are, in fact, 3 more weeks of school and not 2 as I hoped. To all who are doing exams I pray that you get through them in your right mind. For those who aren't doing exams, I pray you get through life in your right mind. Until next time, see you when I see you.
On Wednesday I went to sleep at 3 am because I was watching Keenan and Kel (Orange Soda!!!) I officially hate Daylight Saving Time, all the shows are pushed back one hour. Four hours later, I rushed out of bed to bathe and get ready for my 8 am class. After skipping breakfast, because I had to leave in 10 minutes, pack my bag and brush my teeth, I rushed for my flask, sitting lone on the counter. The day went on, class, (hunger), class, (starvation), class, (now about to die). As I lay dying, outside of class, I took out my fork, unwrapped it and made myself mentally prepared. There's a quote saying, "True poverty is not having anything. True poverty is not having anything and not knowing if it will get better. True poverty is having no hope." Well I was dirt poor. The flask was strangely warm when I touched it, 5 hours later, but you know what they say, a hungry man is a man who does not have food. I opened the flask, with great expectancy; a smile painted across my face as I anticipated relief...ok let's try that again...I opened the flask with great expectancy and a smile painted across my face as I anticipated relief...flask open, where's the relief. WHERE'S MY LUNCH?!?!
I sat on the bench by myself, staring into this pond of steaming water. I didn't know what to think. It just added to an already sky diving without a parachute day. I thought, "Maybe I should go buy some Ramin, shake it up and eat it." But that wouldn't make a good story, would it? Plus I had no money. But what's worse is that I had no wallet.
As my already avalanching day continued to be buried under the tragic events, I decided to call mummy (with the phone with no money). I explained the situation and she said to call daddy. Well I also explained that I don't have money on my phone. A few moments later, daddy called me while I was dragging myself, my pride and my flask full of hot water around campus. I followed these instructions to the famous 218 - my life saver - where I was greeted by these warm (no pun intended), welcoming words, "How's your hot water Mr. King?" In love, I answered, since you shouldn't bit the hand that feeds you. I ate and went back to school, while news about this spread across the world like disturbed ants.
My life never seems to be devoid of interesting events. Maybe I should write a book about my life - I'd call it "A Book About My Life". On Wednesday, I learnt a new fill and on Tuesday I had a blast but that's classified information. I found out today that there are, in fact, 3 more weeks of school and not 2 as I hoped. To all who are doing exams I pray that you get through them in your right mind. For those who aren't doing exams, I pray you get through life in your right mind. Until next time, see you when I see you.
Monday, November 09, 2009
Out To Sea?
As I sit here, wondering what to tell you about my week I am drawn towards the sea. Living on an island, your metaphors and life lessons often come from the sea. That is not a bad thing however. The sea is amazing. It is the fountain of mystery. Sailors have long dreaded it, conjuring outrageous stories, myths and legends on it. Many hymns are based on it. Well obviously, there is nothing like it! I hope you don't drown in my love for the ocean but see where I am going.
As I sit here, in my boat, writing what I am going to tell you, I remember my week. I remember on Monday being so happy, awaiting the rest of the week, planning my study times and all that jazz. Then I remember sitting in Caribbean Civilization and in two two's (not four) my sky became dark and I was pannoyed at this lecturer. He was talking about Religion and Spirituality. I've come to realise that human wisdom is like modular arithmetic. In modular arithmetic, there are only a finite set of numbers - eg. a clock only has 12 numbers. So when one has hit the highest point (12) you just go back to the beginning (12 + 1 = 13? No, 12+ 1 = 1 [mod 12]). Does that make sense? So the lecturer, who got his doctorate last Saturday, explained that Africans did not have a religion, he likes to call them "Spiritual Technologies" (and we go back to 1). He went on to say, that in religions there is the belief that only one way is right but when one uses a spiritual technology, he/she believes that there are many right ways (that seems like a very primitive technology). That raises a lot of questions I am not entertaining.
Then I remember my wonderful Tuesday at Campus Crusade for Christ and that gift of conversation I was given with Sam (from the Logos hope). Then I remember Wednesday and Thursday and taking the day off on Friday and skip all of those unexciting moments. For certain though, I will never stay at Eagle Hall Tabernacle by myself again. On Wednesday, I decided to leave school, because I was just sick of being there, to go to drumming classes. As I was in the car eating my lunch and listening to the radio, I made face contact with this random guy walking down the street. How did he see me between the gate? I don't know. Anyway, he walked in the parking lot and popped up by my window and said, "Can you do me a favour?...I want to get a chocolate from the supermarket so I wanted to know if you could help me." So what did I think? "Umm...strange but I guess I could give you a ride. Which supermarket is this?" As I stared wondering these things (especially where he came from) he asked me for $4. My next thought was "There is chocolate that costs $4. That must be really big." I told him that I had no money (because I didn't) yet I was quite disappointed that he didn't ask for a ride. He left and then I went to sleep. As I slept I could hear the grass moving across the road and people's footsteps as they walked past the car. I was in a state of heightened attention, so I barely slept. All the while I was thinking, "Ya know, someone could easily put their hand in the FULLY OPENED window and steal something or do something worse. Pretty strange, eh? Only in Barbados. That was probably the worse hour I had that week (the lecturer had me vex for 20 min, then I shut him off).
I finally snap back to reality, rested from my break and ready to tackle this paper. If not for God's mercies where I could be is limitless. If it had not been for the Lord on my side (literally) where would I be? I have three more weeks of school and to those who are preparing for exams I pray that you would study and God would give you the success he wants to give you.
Grace and Peace.
As I sit here, in my boat, writing what I am going to tell you, I remember my week. I remember on Monday being so happy, awaiting the rest of the week, planning my study times and all that jazz. Then I remember sitting in Caribbean Civilization and in two two's (not four) my sky became dark and I was pannoyed at this lecturer. He was talking about Religion and Spirituality. I've come to realise that human wisdom is like modular arithmetic. In modular arithmetic, there are only a finite set of numbers - eg. a clock only has 12 numbers. So when one has hit the highest point (12) you just go back to the beginning (12 + 1 = 13? No, 12+ 1 = 1 [mod 12]). Does that make sense? So the lecturer, who got his doctorate last Saturday, explained that Africans did not have a religion, he likes to call them "Spiritual Technologies" (and we go back to 1). He went on to say, that in religions there is the belief that only one way is right but when one uses a spiritual technology, he/she believes that there are many right ways (that seems like a very primitive technology). That raises a lot of questions I am not entertaining.
Then I remember my wonderful Tuesday at Campus Crusade for Christ and that gift of conversation I was given with Sam (from the Logos hope). Then I remember Wednesday and Thursday and taking the day off on Friday and skip all of those unexciting moments. For certain though, I will never stay at Eagle Hall Tabernacle by myself again. On Wednesday, I decided to leave school, because I was just sick of being there, to go to drumming classes. As I was in the car eating my lunch and listening to the radio, I made face contact with this random guy walking down the street. How did he see me between the gate? I don't know. Anyway, he walked in the parking lot and popped up by my window and said, "Can you do me a favour?...I want to get a chocolate from the supermarket so I wanted to know if you could help me." So what did I think? "Umm...strange but I guess I could give you a ride. Which supermarket is this?" As I stared wondering these things (especially where he came from) he asked me for $4. My next thought was "There is chocolate that costs $4. That must be really big." I told him that I had no money (because I didn't) yet I was quite disappointed that he didn't ask for a ride. He left and then I went to sleep. As I slept I could hear the grass moving across the road and people's footsteps as they walked past the car. I was in a state of heightened attention, so I barely slept. All the while I was thinking, "Ya know, someone could easily put their hand in the FULLY OPENED window and steal something or do something worse. Pretty strange, eh? Only in Barbados. That was probably the worse hour I had that week (the lecturer had me vex for 20 min, then I shut him off).
I finally snap back to reality, rested from my break and ready to tackle this paper. If not for God's mercies where I could be is limitless. If it had not been for the Lord on my side (literally) where would I be? I have three more weeks of school and to those who are preparing for exams I pray that you would study and God would give you the success he wants to give you.
Grace and Peace.
Sunday, November 01, 2009
October Overnight
It is amazing how quickly a week goes by, and how dirty my room gets in one. Just last week it was October. Now it's November. Christmas is coming. Independence celebrations are coming. Exams are coming. My birthday is coming! It is said that all good things must come to an end. Looking back on this month, and how quickly it went by, I am glad. Sure, the laughs, the smiles, the jokes, and the exams were all fun but if a good thing doesn't come to an end, how will a better one begin?
This was one crazy week. The Law Faculty celebrated Halloween this week, so everyday, the students dressed according to a theme. Monday was childhood day. I came to school and noticed all these girls with ribbons in their hair, short skirts and what's not. At first I thought it was just the few crazy people at UWI who had nothing better to do. Then I went to a class full of Law students and saw all of them were dressed like that. After the class, a couple of my friends were discussing the matter when out of the darkness appeared this yellow shirt and dark sunglasses. He stood about 5' 9" tall and walked with his head held high. The bib chocked him as he proudly displayed his love for cookies. But what was worse was the diaper he had on which, after a day's walk had turned into a baby T (string that is). Need I say more? Tuesday was sleep wear...need I say more? On Wednesday I was afforded the privilege of speaking with Captain Jack Sparrow...Yeah Savi!
My mid-terms are finally over! But that's pretty boring stuff compared to meeting the Captain. I mean, it was like a Disney Land show. There were even fairies! The fairy part was pretty disturbing though, since all of them were male...eww. On Saturday, yesterday, I had my final mid-term - Caribbean Civilization. The teacher, who is now referred to as Teletubby, Tinky Winky, Dispy, Lala or Po because well, he looks like a chocolate bear. One day I went to class hungry and got this vision of biting off his head or poking him in his belly and all this caramel would ooze out. Of course, I cracked up in my chair and my friend told me I need help, but I was hungry so all I could see was food. Anyways, after a great start I got to the last essay with 7 minutes to go. As I am scrambling down the words, I thought, maybe I should have paid more attention in class instead of looking at her and listening to all the stories of how bad a teacher she was at my friend's school. But I still managed to scramble down something...until...*queue dramatic music*...the unthinkable happened...*scream*...yes, my pen died. Usually, I go to exams with one pen, maybe two but somehow there were 4 on my table. So when my favourite pen died I was so thankful that I had the others. I still felt sorrow, that was my favourite pen.
That was pretty much my week. It's November already! October just whizzed by. Hopefully November will too until December 23, when time will stop like the month of September.
This was one crazy week. The Law Faculty celebrated Halloween this week, so everyday, the students dressed according to a theme. Monday was childhood day. I came to school and noticed all these girls with ribbons in their hair, short skirts and what's not. At first I thought it was just the few crazy people at UWI who had nothing better to do. Then I went to a class full of Law students and saw all of them were dressed like that. After the class, a couple of my friends were discussing the matter when out of the darkness appeared this yellow shirt and dark sunglasses. He stood about 5' 9" tall and walked with his head held high. The bib chocked him as he proudly displayed his love for cookies. But what was worse was the diaper he had on which, after a day's walk had turned into a baby T (string that is). Need I say more? Tuesday was sleep wear...need I say more? On Wednesday I was afforded the privilege of speaking with Captain Jack Sparrow...Yeah Savi!
My mid-terms are finally over! But that's pretty boring stuff compared to meeting the Captain. I mean, it was like a Disney Land show. There were even fairies! The fairy part was pretty disturbing though, since all of them were male...eww. On Saturday, yesterday, I had my final mid-term - Caribbean Civilization. The teacher, who is now referred to as Teletubby, Tinky Winky, Dispy, Lala or Po because well, he looks like a chocolate bear. One day I went to class hungry and got this vision of biting off his head or poking him in his belly and all this caramel would ooze out. Of course, I cracked up in my chair and my friend told me I need help, but I was hungry so all I could see was food. Anyways, after a great start I got to the last essay with 7 minutes to go. As I am scrambling down the words, I thought, maybe I should have paid more attention in class instead of looking at her and listening to all the stories of how bad a teacher she was at my friend's school. But I still managed to scramble down something...until...*queue dramatic music*...the unthinkable happened...*scream*...yes, my pen died. Usually, I go to exams with one pen, maybe two but somehow there were 4 on my table. So when my favourite pen died I was so thankful that I had the others. I still felt sorrow, that was my favourite pen.
That was pretty much my week. It's November already! October just whizzed by. Hopefully November will too until December 23, when time will stop like the month of September.
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