Be My Escape

Last week I told you about the monster of a mid-term I had and how I'm hoping that I did well. But even though that left me washed up I still had to pick up and move on to the next test. This is turning out to be an interesting final semester. It's like in the movies when 4 or more people gang up on the protagonist before an epic fight scene. The difference is that instead of it being choreographed and only one (at most 2) people swinging at a time everything seems to be coming my way. It's like being smothered in work. All I can do is work and hold my breath for the good results.

At times I wish that school wasn't so much - so much work, so many people with issues, so much more than just credit hours - and I could see past the sleep debt. For a really long time I've been trying to ease the stress and escape the stresses without doing something foolish like stop working. Christians say that each of us has a "cross to bear" (Luke 9:23), a "cup to drink" (Matthew 20:22) basically explaining the troubles and trials we have in this life. And we say things like "A crossless life leads to a crownless death" (i.e. if you don't suffer for Christ's sake you won't receive the reward). It's true - no blood, no victory. But the really interesting thing about being Christian is that the pressure seems to come two ways but leave in only one. Life's already hard being a human and being a Christian brings more difficulties (promised difficulties) and it's not like when it gets stressful you just pick the best thing in skinnies and unlatch the valve. Or smoke some weed and go green. The thing is, we don't escape the troubles of this life.

Too often we (as people in general) try to escape hard times by taking short cuts or tranquilizers with dangerous side effects without really thinking. When Christians present hope it's not the ticket out of stress. This week I realised this. I enjoyed this week but if you heard the stuff that happened you would be surprised (as I was) that I still enjoyed it (and I'm not masochistic - sticks and stones break my bones and chains and whips do also). I was sleep deprived, had a test and two papers to write, an assignment due this week and another test on the day I have to hand in the assignment. So yeah, I am strung out. But I realised that no matter how close the flames get I won't burn. So instead of looking for an escape, I let God be my escape.

How? Well I simply obey. I know what I need to do. I need to go to school and concentrate in class, come home, sit my butt down, put my head in some books for a few hours each night and go to bed...oh and eat food. Of course I know what work needs to be done - the weekly maths assignments and mids, etc - but focusing on the sheer work load doesn't get me anywhere. I work, trusting that God will give me the strength and sanity to finish well.

That was pretty much my week. Like I said it wasn't nearly a scotch free breeze but we made it. So I hope that when life gets terrible like mine, or even worse, we would slow down, breathe and continue. I haven't been to the end but I think it'll be worth it.